been into BL lately and kinda messed up in the head

the curiosity level o be in that world gets stronger 

admire their bravery to come out

but in reality.. is it make sense

found out why prefer certain type of BL story

love their interactions 

the free

the relax

the fun

being free in action

yet feeling loved and respect

those kind of feeling

probebly due to past experience

where i felt restrained 

not being me infront of partner

thats not me

d best part of thos BL is that they are still being bro and effectionate at the same time

i like the broness the toughness and yet thet attentiveness of their significant other

maybe its too utopian 

something that i cant have