The funny thing about movies / animes / dramas / books

Bila dah layan nak cepat habis

tapi bila dah habis rasa kosong

mcm x cukup

nak lahi dan lagi

hahaha

so nak habis ke xnak habis ni

tp kalau dragged on lama sgt jd bosan plak

xmasuk akal

hahahha

manusia la manusia

 Susah gila bila tengah high cmni

sume mende tak kena

mcm ada menda sangkut kat tekak

susah nak bernafas

was it because of coffee

penat nak burn off the energy ni

 who am i to judge others since im rotten myself

the thing is, we never have the qualification to judge other people

cos we are of the same level

hamba

if you focus on one thing or genre

u will finally find the pattern

and u will eventually get sick of it

then u start to find new thing

then the cycle continues

Put me behind wheels and u will find another crazy side of me

Love driving but hate it at the same time

 been into BL lately and kinda messed up in the head

the curiosity level o be in that world gets stronger 

admire their bravery to come out

but in reality.. is it make sense

found out why prefer certain type of BL story

love their interactions 

the free

the relax

the fun

being free in action

yet feeling loved and respect

those kind of feeling

probebly due to past experience

where i felt restrained 

not being me infront of partner

thats not me

d best part of thos BL is that they are still being bro and effectionate at the same time

i like the broness the toughness and yet thet attentiveness of their significant other

maybe its too utopian 

something that i cant have 

 many things had happened for the past few years

getting better 

maybe not 100%

darkness keep on creeping

through years it still come slowly

have you ever feel afraid of your own self

afraid that u might be eaten by that darkness and loose yourself 

and then u feel immense regret once u recover

that..

i think no one can understand this feeling 

the feeling of emptiness but fulfilling at the same time

having peope aorund and yet empty at the same time